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Showing posts from April, 2013

784: My favourite boys

My two favourite boys. The two people that I love the most right now is my boyfriend and Peanut. They make the annoying things in life bearable and bring joy in the little things in life.
The boyfriend wasn't feeling well (definitely wasn't from me!) and has been sleeping since 7pm-ish. And my God! He can sleep! I accidentally dropped my books in the room, dropped a water bottle (the stainless steel ones from Bros mind you) and even several missed calls at full volume and he was still fast asleep. I was doing laundry and suddenly saw a cockroach. I HATE cockroaches. And I'm afraid of them as well. Since he was sleeping and I didn't want to wake him up, I used the insecticide. I didn't think that it would start running and flying around the house. OMG. Worst thing ever. So after several stifled screams I decided to wake him up and ask him to kill it. When I woke him up and asked him to kill the cockroach he was like "What? I thought you were being raped".…

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I went to City Square earlier today to buy something and since I wasn't feeling that well, the boyfriend decided to meet me there and then come home with me. Once he reached, we went to have dinner. Obviously the first thing he saw was the shopping bag and and started scolding me and hit me on the arm lightly. I mean, it's all in fun. This happened on the escalator and both of us were laughing. What turned my laughter upside down was the guy on the escalator behind me who went up a couple steps, turned around and gave us a disgusted look. I know I shouldn't be affected by it, but I am. And it's not like we were holding hands or anything of that sort. He just jokingly hit my arm and we were laughing on the escalator. Oh well.

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I was going to write about something else and we all know that I'm too emotionally constipated to pour it all out that easily. So let's digress for a while about something else shall we.
One of my mum's friend is following me on Instagram. WHY would anyone do that. *sigh* It's not that I post up scandalous stuff on Instagram. But it just makes me very uncomfortable. And I don't want to make my account private coz, well, I don't post anything private. If that is the case, then I should be okay with my mum's friend following me on Instagram right? But I'm not. And I don't know why. Also, I don't know what to do about it. 
The other day Peanut gave me the link to this Gay Confessions page on Facebook. Have a look at it. Some of the coming out stories are rather heartbreaking.

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So I've been sick for a while now. I've been having fever since Saturday. And that spoiled our (the boyfriend and I) plans to go to Singapore the next day. So after several blood tests and bills more than RM 700 later, the cause is tied between a viral fever and mild dengue. I'm supposed to go for another test next week to confirm it.
The boyfriend has been staying over to take care of me. And can I just say that he's the best. He makes sure that I take the medication on time. Even in the middle of the night he'll wake me up to take the medicine. Maybe those are tiny things to some people. But I feel like those are the important things. This one night, he woke me up to scold me because I kept pushing away the blanket as soon as he put it on me every time. Haha.
But he's going back to his place tomorrow night since I'm feeling better now. I really am going to miss having him around. The highlight of my day is when he comes home in the evening and we have di…

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Some people might think I'm overreacting but I think I have valid reasons. I'm not comfortable at all when something affects my freedom. Yes, it's a huge deal to me. Maybe because I really had to fight for it and stand up for myself. I don't know. The bottom line is, no one understands the situation. And honestly I'm not even expecting anyone to understand. Just don't go pretending like you do when you clearly don't. 
I'm just very frustrated about a lot of things. And it's even more frustrating because I can't blog about it. 
I'm too lazy to add some songs that I've recently discovered. Covers to be precise. I'll add them in the next post. Going to sleep and hopefully I feel less frustrated when I wake up.

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I was watching 'Prayers for Bobby' a while ago. If you haven't, you should watch it. I haven't finished watching it yet because I was crying too much and then my mum called me so I had to pause it and compose myself before I answered the call ><
I'm blogging about this for the umpteenth time. But I found this on Tumblr and it made sense. It conveyed every single thing that I've wanted to say but didn't know how to. Defining home has always been hard for me.

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I don't understand people who say that being gay is a choice. It's not easy being gay. Why would anyone purposely choose a more difficult life?
I went to drop off the boyfriend at his place a while ago. He asked me to stop before the entrance and without thinking, I asked him why and he didn't say anything. I know. He doesn't want to be seen with me. And I understand that. Because I know the consequences of what will happen if he comes out, or if someone finds out. But at the same time, I can't deny that I was very hurt.

I think we can all relate to this GIF very much.


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I had a relatively relaxing day today. The keyword being relative. After getting home, I was checking Instagram and twitter and what not and discovered something. One of my friend's ex-boyfriend is sort of bffs (I think. or at least close friends) with a blogger I used to talk to almost every single day when I started blogging. And that blogger is a friend of another blogger, who happens to know another friend of mine. It really is a tiny circle after all. Almost everyone knows everyone. I don't think people really know me. I'd rather remain invisible anyway. You know, being fat and ugly really does have its perks! My classmates, or almost anyone never asks me whether I have a girlfriend. Whoop whoop!

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It's 11:50pm. On a weekday. And I'm awake. Supposed to wake up at 5:30am tomorrow. Can't sleep coz I had coffee around 5pm.
I'm physically exhausted. So much to read. Sometimes I wonder whether the doctors forget that we are human. 
There's a gecko behind the refrigerator. I find them extremely disgusting. And I'm very afraid of them. I don't even know how it got inside the house since all the windows are always closed. Of course except during the weekends. That must have been when it got inside. I called the boyfriend when I saw it. Not that he could have done anything anyway coz he wasn't here >_>
I need to get my photo taken soon to be submitted for something. But I'm in a dilemma. My hair is too long for it to look nice on the photo. If I cut my hair it'll be too short. And I don't have enough time for it to grow to that perfect length that's just nice on photos. #gayboyproblems Haha. Funny thing is, I always look weird in all…

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I have given up on blogging every day as I used to. Trying to keep it at a weekly update pace now.
Uni was hectic as usual. I felt like last week passed by rather quickly. The usual stuff in uni. Drama and more drama and myself making it rather obvious that I can't stand some people. No one likes attention seekers anyway.
The boyfriend and I went to Danga Bay the other night. Wasn't a very pleasant outing though. It was really humid. And on top of that, I don't think anyone there knows about the existence of deodorant. Plus, there's not much to see there.
Anyway, a little positivity in Tumblr style for the new week.